Let me see a show if hands of parents who have a strong willed child. OK, I know I can't see you, but I'm sure a bunch of you do!!! Well, in our case, this child would be Peyton. And of course, we love our baby sooooo much, and we thank God for her, but she definitely wants to do what she wants to do, when she wants to do it. And if you know me (Chenee), you know that it doesn't sit well with me, because my style of child rearing is old school. So long story short, we've been having behavioral problems with her at school. I mean to the point to where is was becoming an everyday occurance.
Lowell and I were stumped. Like, we didn't know what else to do. We put her on punishment, took away all of her toys, gave her spankings here and there (legally of course, nothing unreasonable, excessive, or causeing bodily injury). At this point, we reached out to our parents for help, and even considered taking her to counseling. Was her behavior that bad? No, it wasn't, but is was down right disrespectful, and we knew if we didn't fix it now, we'd be trying fixing it later after the monster was created.
And I'll tell you one thing, timing is EVERYTHING! We just so happened had a family vacation planned for the 2nd week in October. We also told her that if her behavior didn't improve, she'd be staying home from vacation. Ironically, the week before this vacation, she once again got in trouble at school, and when her teacher reminded her that her behavior was going to dictate whether or not she was going to be able to go on vacation, she told her teacher, and I quote, "They're just going to let me go anyway." When I found this out, I was burning up inside!!! But my mom told me "You need to keep her butt home. She can stay with me." So many things were going through head. Wait, this is a family vacation. We're going to be away from her for 5 whole days. Will it work if she stays home? What do we do if it doesn't work? Will I be able to enjoy myself without my complete family? Yeah, the list goes on and on. So after Lowell and I talked, we thought it would be best for her to stay home.
Unsure of what would come of this, I struggled so bad. The night before we left, I cried like a baby!!!! I felt like a horrible mom for leaving my baby at home. But I had to try SOMETHING! So tough love is what it was.
Long story short, we went on vacation, I struggled SO BAD, I missed my baby, but guess what, IT WORKED! Do you know as a result of us following through on her punishment, she had the most amazing week of her entire educational career, and has been since then. She followed directions not only at school, but also at home! Her entire demeanor changed now that she knew we meant business.
Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.~Proverbs 13:24. The Bible makes it clear that we must discipline our children. And every child is different. You have to figure out which form of discipline works for each personality. For Maxwell, because he's so sensitive, all he needs is to be reminded that he has disappointed us to get him on the right path, and take away his weekend time on electronics. Peyton on the other hand, because she's so strong willed, we can't give her idle threats, because she's taking notes! And as much as it hurts for us to watch our babies miss out on things they didn't earn, it's so neccesary. Because otherwise, we're creating roadblocks for them in their adult hood.
And lastly, Lowell and I MUST BE on the same page when it comes to discipline. I mean, I didn't bring them into this world on my own. And they need to know we're a team. In the end, I know all of this is going to pay off, and we're raising 2 people who will make a difference in this world, and it starts with us. #TeamOstlund
