Advice is a funny thing. It may be one of the most freely given forms of help in the world. But it may also be one of the most ignored forms of help in the world. So ladies and gentlemen I give you my top 10 tips for being single. Mind you, the last time I was single I was 17 years old, so these magnificent words of wisdom will be coming from my observations of the world around me and not my own experiences.
Number One. Stop being so thirsty. The only people that will attract are people that will use that to their advantage. If you are looking for a relationship you don’t want to look like prey.
Number Two. Being single looks like fun. Enjoy the freedom to accomplish goals and do things that you want to do. Being in a relationship adds compromise in many cases and can slow down the progress of your goals.
Number Three. Self reflection. No one is perfect. We all have something we want to improve about ourselves. Find something about yourself and fix it. If you can’t find anything ask a good friend. A good friend will tell you the truth and not just say you are fine.
Number Four. Find your favorites. Favorite everything. Music genre, hobby, food, restaurant, book, dessert, song, hang out, travel destination, self care, clothing brand, etc. You would be surprised how many people don’t know these things. If there are ties in some categories flip a coin and go with that. This helps you learn about you, but it also helps other people know more about you and gives them opportunities to do something nice for you.
Number Five. Read the 5 love languages. This will help you understand what makes you feel loved. This doesn’t only apply romantically but in all of your relationships. Everyone should do this.
Number Six. Learn something new. Take a class, find a new hobby. There is something you’re interested in that you’re not doing. Do it.
Number Seven. Reevaluate your standards. I’m not saying abandon them, you have to have standards. List them out and number them in order of importance. Then look at the ones that ranked lower and decide if they’re deal breakers. Compare yourself to your own standards. Do you measure up? We all know someone that we don’t go out to eat with because it’s too much of a hassle and they are super picky and they send their food back 5 times and always need to speak to the manager, blah blah blah. If you don’t know someone then it’s you. People carry that energy over in to their dating life, and most people don’t want to deal with that, especially if they are dating later in life.
Number Eight. Get healthier. Not just physically. Mentally, emotionally, organizationally. Get your crap together. Get rid of things you don’t need in your life. Do you need to lose weight? Find a nutritionist and trainer. Do you need help dealing with childhood baggage? Find a therapist. Stuck in a rut in your career? Find a mentor or lifestyle coach. Home a disorganized disaster? Find an organizational specialist. There are tons of great options to find help with things.
Number Nine. Think about your body language. There are people that claim they want to be in a relationship but if you bumped into them in the store, everything about them screams “Leave me alone!” Be mindful of the message you’re communicating non verbally. Also try smiling. Happiness is infectious. Everyone wants to have a good time, and if you look happy, people will pick up on it. Always remember that happiness is a choice, and if you aren’t happy you can still change your mind.
Number Ten. Me time. Everyone needs me time. Some more than others. Time by yourself is therapeutic and helps keep you leveled out. It helps you hold on to your identity. Meditate on The Word. Ask for God’s guidance in all things. Remember, it’s good to be you.
“Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” Psalms 37:3-4 NIV
